20050528
postergirl
when news came in a car
and a messenger that you'd
somehow decided on your
own to leap into the inifinite
black abyss i remembered
leaping into your arms and
wrapping every appendange
around your trunklike physique
"i love you, i love you, i love you,"
and i knew you meant it too
even though it was all a joke
nothing was meant of it - you were
my brother and to have lost you
so publicly and suddenly, i screamed
bloody why that suddenly all the
lights and the free trendy house
on the pier jutting into the pacific
with the perfect sunsets every night
and the free publicity and the secure
dj stint in this town's hottest radio
station, yes, that one we said created
history, yes, all of that shattered
the way mirror crumbles to infinite pieces
tiny enough to induce bleeding in case
you choose to swallow, i could still
follow you, you know, i could still stop
just like you did, didn't you realize
just how endless the sunset now tarries
how limitless now the sky seems and how
inane every tune and blast of music has
turned every moment thereafter my sister
called
sobbed
into the mouthpiece
i threw the phone down
and picked up another
and kept on screaming
"you're fucking joking."
they asked me to call a number in case
friends suspect friends want to discuss
throwing in pearls in exchange for some
unfathomable peace, why would you want
to go somewhere no one can reach you?
i made them their commercial for suicide.
i told them to call a number if they think
something is wrong, and i wonder how many
more dramas have i sparked, how many
more intimates have i frayed all because
someone thinks one way when in reality...
i was far so i didn't see.
framed selfishly,
a mobius eternally:
you gave up on me.
---
luckily, i haven't yet met anyone who's suceeded in suicide. i just thought about that girl on MTV's real world seattle who lost a best friend, and i wanted to capture her grief.
ethically, morally wrong for a writer, because i just wanted to practice photography in words. shortly after that episode, and still hurting, the MTV character did make the commercial, but seemed better then, starting to let go of those who want to leave. ¶ 5/28/2005 03:38:00 PM
and a messenger that you'd
somehow decided on your
own to leap into the inifinite
black abyss i remembered
leaping into your arms and
wrapping every appendange
around your trunklike physique
"i love you, i love you, i love you,"
and i knew you meant it too
even though it was all a joke
nothing was meant of it - you were
my brother and to have lost you
so publicly and suddenly, i screamed
bloody why that suddenly all the
lights and the free trendy house
on the pier jutting into the pacific
with the perfect sunsets every night
and the free publicity and the secure
dj stint in this town's hottest radio
station, yes, that one we said created
history, yes, all of that shattered
the way mirror crumbles to infinite pieces
tiny enough to induce bleeding in case
you choose to swallow, i could still
follow you, you know, i could still stop
just like you did, didn't you realize
just how endless the sunset now tarries
how limitless now the sky seems and how
inane every tune and blast of music has
turned every moment thereafter my sister
called
sobbed
into the mouthpiece
i threw the phone down
and picked up another
and kept on screaming
"you're fucking joking."
they asked me to call a number in case
friends suspect friends want to discuss
throwing in pearls in exchange for some
unfathomable peace, why would you want
to go somewhere no one can reach you?
i made them their commercial for suicide.
i told them to call a number if they think
something is wrong, and i wonder how many
more dramas have i sparked, how many
more intimates have i frayed all because
someone thinks one way when in reality...
i was far so i didn't see.
framed selfishly,
a mobius eternally:
you gave up on me.
---
luckily, i haven't yet met anyone who's suceeded in suicide. i just thought about that girl on MTV's real world seattle who lost a best friend, and i wanted to capture her grief.
ethically, morally wrong for a writer, because i just wanted to practice photography in words. shortly after that episode, and still hurting, the MTV character did make the commercial, but seemed better then, starting to let go of those who want to leave. ¶ 5/28/2005 03:38:00 PM
